And in winning news stories we have the following.  I found it last week, but forgot to share until now. For that, I apologize.

Man with dead weasel-like creature accused of Hoquiam assault | Seattle Times Newspaper.

Man with dead weasel-like creature accused of Hoquiam assault

Police say a man was carrying a dead weasel when he burst into a Hoquiam apartment and assaulted a man.

The Associated Press

HOQUIAM, Wash. —
Police say a man was carrying a dead weasel when he burst into a Hoquiam apartment and assaulted a man.
The victim asked, “Why are you carrying a weasel?” Police said the attacker said, “It’s not a weasel, it’s a martin,” then punched him in the nose and fled.
The attacker was apparently looking for his girlfriend and had gone to her former boyfriend’s apartment Monday night where the victim was a guest.
KXRO reports he left carcass behind.
Police later found the suspect arguing with his girlfriend at another location and arrested the 33-year-old Hoquiam man after a fight.
He said he had found the martin dead near Hoquiam, but police don’t know why he carried it with him.
A martin is a member of the weasel family.
—
Information from: KXRO-AM, http://www.kxro.com